Colbert Hits Himself With a Rock to Speak to Sarah Palin ‘in a Language She’d Understand’

During Tuesday night’s Late Show, host Stephen Colbert eviscerated former Alaska governor Sarah Palin during his monologue, mocking the former Veep candidate’s infamously confusing style of speech. Two days ago, Palin was engaging in something called “rock running,” a sport (I guess?) that led the former Gov to sharing photos of herself badly injured after hitting her head on a rock. As Colbert correctly pointed out, in typical Sarah Palin fashion she somehow managed to use a completely unrelated incident to hit hard at Democrats, this time angling her head injury against Hillary Clinton. This is the actual written response from Palin following her rock running rumble:
Leave Hillary Alone, Bullies. Aww, c’mon guys, give her a break. Anyone can be out of commission…. for weeks on end… whilst in the heat of battle for the highest office in the land… Leave Hillary alone! All that email-evidenced yoga, wedding planning, and cookie-baking-grandma-duty wears you out. Believe you me… Heck, even those of us claiming to be fit as a (seasoned?) fiddle, hit bumps in the wellness road. Even I. Especially I. (Remember Piper’s middle name is “Grace”; mine isn’t.)… Glad for Hillary’s protective media’s precedence. The next woman running for POTUS has no need to answer to much of anything, for we’ve got weddings to plan, and Down Dogs to do, and cookies in the oven! So just leave us alone, boys.

…and scene. On its own, Palin’s response is incredibly bizarre, but it truly is the stuff of great late night fodder. Colbert wasted to time in hopping on; “Palin fell and hit her head on a rock. Now don’t worry, she’s OK; or, you know, the same… now I would chalk that up to head trauma if it didn’t sound like everything else she says.” “I would like to wish Sarah Palin a speedy recovery, and I would like to do it in a language she’d understand,” he said, before grabbing a prop rock and smashing his own head with it repeatedly. What followed was a pitch perfect version of a typical Palin rant, complete with sing-songy non sequiturs and rough ridin’ American spirit. Watch above via CBS. — [image via screengrab]

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