It’s Friday, which means it’s time to separate the chumps from the champs in Mediaite’s Winners and Losers, our scorecard of who rocked and who flopped in the headines.
This week, a special off-year election edition, featuring Doug Hoffman, Mike Bloomberg, and more:
The Bronze Loser: Mike Bloomberg
As expected, New York’s richest citizen bought himself a third mayoral term. But somehow after spending $151.27 per vote (much of it his own money) to run against the little-known City Comptroller (who Obama barely supported by name) he STILL only managed a marginal victory. Then again, a win’s a win, and as the mayor-for-life pointed out to reporters, “The Yankees win, whether they win in four, five, six or seven, it’s Number 27 – that’s all that matters, okay?” (Funny, no one can compete with their spending either.)
The Bronze Winner: Tim Kaine
The DNC chairman proved a skilled spinster Wednesday morning, glossing over key gubernatorial defeats like a pro! Before Governor Kaine’s explanation, you might have thought incumbent John Corzine should have won New Jersey, what with his mounds of money and the backing of the Garden State democratic machine. But now you know neither Corzine nor Virginia democratic candidate Creigh Deeds ever had a shot at victory – not because they blew it, but because of historical trends. Well played!
The Silver Loser: CNN
Election coverage was the network’s bread and butter back in ‘08. Remember the ‘magic wall’ and those awesome virtual holograms? Apparently you can only dazzle viewers with snazzy graphics for so long! “The Best Political Team on Television” was the least watched Tuesday night, finishing dead last among cable news outlets. And that includes HLN, which didn’t even cover the 09 election. Which begs the question, how’s that non-partisan thing working out?
The Silver Winner: Doug Hoffman
Long before the votes were tallied in the NY-23 congressional race, right-wing pundits had declared the Conservative party candidate the winner. And after he lost by a few points to Democrat Bill Owens? STILL the winner! Ok, Maybe not the winner-winner, but his loss was still a Republican victory. Or Something. Sarah Palin broke it down on Facebook: “The race for NY’s 23rd is not over. It’s just postponed until 2010.” Gotcha. So letting a democrat represent the district for the first time since the Civil War frees up Republicans to focus on the real race!
The Gold Loser: Barack Obama
If you believe the exit polls, GOP sweeps in New Jersey and Virginia were not be a referendum on Obama’s presidency. But they’re still kind of his fault! Because low turnout among young voters is certainly a referendum on Obama’s sexiness. Between an economy in free-fall, two wars, and healthcare reform, Obama forgot to keep politics fun and exciting for the kids! And with that, his “Vote or Die” youth coalition of 08 became the “Vote or Don’t Bother” youth disassociation of 09, propelling Republicans to victory.
The Gold Winner: John McCain
A year later, the former presidential hopeful is sure to have regrets about his failed candidacy. But John McCain can look back with pride, knowing he made at least smart decision last year. And that was refusing to let Sarah Palin speak on Election Night. This week the Daily Beast got hold of her undelivered speeches — concession AND victory — and they were as amusing/cringe-worthy as as we might have imagined.