Colbert Rips Trump For Botching Birth Date On Absentee Ballot: We Need a ‘Long-Form Birth Certificate’

On Friday night, Stephen Colbert mocked the Trump family for their various failures in voting in the New York City mayoral election. According to a recent report from Newsweek, President Trump and several members of his family botched their absentee ballots in last month’s election. Trump himself reportedly got his own birth date wrong. “‘I can’t remember when I was born,” Colbert impersonated the president. “‘I demand that I release my long-form birth certificate. I think I was born in Kenya. That’s what I’m hearing. People are telling me. It’s got to be.'” The report notes that Trump was born on June 14, 1946, but he incorrectly put down July instead. “So he made himself a full month younger. Watch out, ladies!” Colbert joked. “Seriously, watch out. He’s a monster. Don’t go near him. He’ll grab you.” The Late Show host poked fun at First Lady Continue reading "Colbert Rips Trump For Botching Birth Date On Absentee Ballot: We Need a ‘Long-Form Birth Certificate’"

Dennis Rodman on His Relationship With Kim Jong-un: He’s ‘Probably’ a Madman, But I Don’t See it

On Wednesday night, former NBA superstar Dennis Rodman stopped by The Late Show and shed some light on his unique relationship with North Korean dictator Kim Jong-un. Stephen Colbert kicked off the conversation by having Rodman explain his shirt, which had a image of himself between President Trump and Kim Jong-un with the word “unite” beneath them. “You. Must. Be. High,” Colbert told Rodman. When asked by The Late Show host why Rodman has visited North Korea five times since 2013, he answered it was because the dictator “liked” him and that he “trusts” him. “When I went over there, the first thing he said to me was, ‘Mr. Rodman, we just want to know, can we trust you?’ I said, ‘Absolutely.’ And that’s how our conversation started.” Rodman said. Rodman dismissed those who say Kim Jong-un is his “best friend,” but that he treats Rodman “as Continue reading "Dennis Rodman on His Relationship With Kim Jong-un: He’s ‘Probably’ a Madman, But I Don’t See it"

Colbert on Trump Recognizing Jerusalem as Israel’s Capital: ‘He Couldn’t Recognize It On a Map’

On Wednesday night, Stephen Colbert addressed President Trump‘s announcement recognizing Jersalem as Israel’s capital and his plans to move the US embassy there in the near future. “Yes, he recognized it in a speech, but I’m still pretty sure he couldn’t recognize it… on a map,” Colbert quipped. The Late Show host explained the holiness of Jerusalem and how “every inch” is disputed between Israelis and Palestinians that they had to “draw a line down the middle of a six-piece Chicken McNuggets at the Jerusalem McDonalds” and that they’re “still fighting over the Gaza Chicken Strip.” He poked fun at Trump’s remarks how acknowledging Jerusalem as Israel’s capital is a “recognition of reality.” “Why start now?” Colbert reacted. Colbert then took a moment to laugh at Trump’s mishap with his dentures during his speech and said he was “looking forward” to his State of the Union Continue reading "Colbert on Trump Recognizing Jerusalem as Israel’s Capital: ‘He Couldn’t Recognize It On a Map’"

Stephen Colbert to Billy Bush: How Do You Feel About NBC Firing You In Light of Matt Lauer?

On Monday night, Billy Bush appeared on The Late Show and spoke at length about his life was changed by the infamous Access Hollywood tape. In the wake of numerous sexual harassment scandals, Stephen Colbert confronted Bush about his firing and invoked the recent firing of Today Show anchor Matt Lauer. “How do you feel about NBC firing you?” Colbert asked. “In light of Matt Lauer being fired for allegations of sexual impropriety?” Bush recalled it being a “difficult time” and that it was “emotionally hot” in the midst of the 2016 election. “My boss, later- months later, said “Publicly, I think we may have moved a little quickly,” Bush responded. “Did they move on you like a b*tch?” Colbert quipped. Colbert then pressed Bush, who at the time recently started a gig on The Today Show, on whether Lauer had any involvement or tried to Continue reading "Stephen Colbert to Billy Bush: How Do You Feel About NBC Firing You In Light of Matt Lauer?"

Colbert Slams Former CBS Colleague Charlie Rose: ‘It’s a Harrowing and Terrible Abuse of Power’

On Tuesday night, Stephen Colbert addressed the controversy that hit his network this week with the recent sexual harassment allegations of Charlie Rose. Colbert informed his audience that Rose was fired from CBS because what he was being accused of was “disturbing and strange.” Among the lewd phone calls, groping, and nudity, he also pointed out that Rose gave unwanted shoulder rubs, something his employees referred to as “the crusty paw.” “And you may make three wishes upon the accursed paw, all of which are… to not get a back rub from Charlie Rose,” he quipped The Late Show host joked that these allegations from The Charlie Rose Show made it the biggest scandal at PBS “since it was revealed that PBS is short for ‘pubes.'” Colbert later pulled an excerpt from the Washington Post bombshell that had one accuser claim that she was invited to his Continue reading "Colbert Slams Former CBS Colleague Charlie Rose: ‘It’s a Harrowing and Terrible Abuse of Power’"

Stephen Colbert Mocks Louie Gohmert’s Conspiracy Chart: ‘Let’s Play Candyland’

On Friday night, Stephen Colbert had some fun at the expense of Rep. Louie Gohmert (R-TX) for his conspiracy chart he displayed during the Jeff Sessions hearing this week. At the hearing, Gohmert used the chart to connect Deputy Attorney General Rod Rosenstein and Special Counsel Robert Mueller to the corruption that took place during the Obama administration, which he thought “stinks to high heaven.” “Yes, it does stink because Louie Gohmert just charted,” Colbert quipped. “Stupid, but deadly.” For further analysis, Colbert had that exact chart made for his show, which he called the “Mouth of Madness.” “Let’s play Candyland,” he told his audience.” The Late Show host began at Barack Obama and followed a line that hit former National Security Advisor Ben Rhodes, and followed another line that hit Obama again elsewhere in the chart. “My God, there’s two of them!” Colbert Continue reading "Stephen Colbert Mocks Louie Gohmert’s Conspiracy Chart: ‘Let’s Play Candyland’"

Stephen Colbert Addresses Al Franken’s Harassment Allegation: ‘C’MON!’

On Thursday night, Stephen Colbert addressed the controversy surrounding Al Franken. “Every day it seems like we find out about another high profile sexual harasser, and today is no exception,” Colbert began. “Brace yourself.” Franken, who recently appeared on The Late Show in August, was accused of forcibly kissing and groping a radio news anchor back in 2006 during a USO trip to Afghanistan. “C’mon Franken!” Colbert reacted. “I guess there’s just no good people left, so let’s just get it over with. Just tell us whatever you did Jimmy Carter, Barack Obama, Tom Hanks, Malala.” The Late Show host said as a fellow comedian that he “long admired” Franken and Continue reading "Stephen Colbert Addresses Al Franken’s Harassment Allegation: ‘C’MON!’"